Thursday's Child - Don't you quit!

        Don’t You Quit!

               Having a child with a disability can be very wearing on us. My youngest son’s bipolar disorder and struggles can be frustrating at times. Only worrying about one day at a time gets me through. Plus there are a lot of rainbows and sunshine bursting through the clouds each day with his hugs and kisses and humor. Someone asked me – if I knew it would be so hard at times – would I do it again? Definitely! Check out the poem, Don’t You Quit, in Vol. 8 of It's Not Rocket Surgery!, and below.

               When my oldest son died unexpectedly at age 8 in 1990, I was absolutely devastated. A friend of mine cut out a newspaper column from “Ask Ann Landers”, Grieving Mother Seeks Comfort, St. Louis Post-Dispatch, reprinted Sunday, March 3, 1991. I’ve modified the letter (from Barbara Brown) to represent my son, Michael, here.

               “If God said to me, ‘You can choose or not choose to have a son, Michael. If you choose to have a son, Michael, he will have blond hair and shiny eyes and a great sense of humor. He will be a ray of sunshine in your life and cheer you on when you are down.

               “But you can have him for only 8 years. And when he leaves, you must pay a great price for those 8 years. That price will be deep sorrow.’

               “I would choose to have Michael.”

               “And if God said to me, ‘When he goes, you can choose for him to have a lingering, painful death, one that would help you adjust to his leaving and give you a chance to say goodbye ...

               “Or you can choose for him to go quickly and painlessly.

               “But if you choose for him to go quickly and painlessly, you must pay a great price, and that price is deep sorrow.’

               “I would choose a quick and painless death for Michael.”

               I feel the same way about any and all difficulties, physical or emotional, with my children. I wouldn’t miss the experience for anything! When I was pregnant with my last child, the caboose of the 15, people asked me, “But what would you do if she was a Downs-Syndrome baby?” Hug her and kiss her and love on her and celebrate her life every day! I would never give up a baby or child because of a possible ‘problem’. 

In fact when 16-weeks pregnant, I refused to take the amniotic-fluid test for Downs Syndrome to find out. It wouldn’t change my decision, so it was a moot point. (The test could cause a miscarriage of a perfectly healthy baby.)

               Focusing on the ‘MY’ in FAMILY causes us to ‘FAIL’. Always putting self first creates very dysfunctional families.

“No other success can compensate for failure in the home.”                                                     David O. McKay

“The most important work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own home.”             Harold B. Lee

Remember, the question isn’t, How do others show their love for me? The question is, especially with children, How do I show my love for them?

               For every experience, if you can’t change your situation, change your attitude.

                                            Spencer W. Kimball

               “It's been my experience that you can nearly always enjoy things if you make up your mind firmly that you will.”
                L.M. Montgomery

Find something good in each day. Have a cleansing cry every once in a while, then keep going. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. Life is good!

               I just love the poem,

Don’t You Quit:

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,

               When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,

               When the funds are low and the debts are high,

               And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,

               When care is pressing you down a bit-

               Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,

               As every one of us sometimes learns,

               And many a fellow turns about

               When he might have won, had he stuck it out.

               Don't give up though the pace seems slow -

               You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than

               It seems to a faint and faltering man;

               Often the struggler has given up

               When he might have captured the victor's cup;

               And he learned too late when the night came down,

               How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out -

               The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,

               And you never can tell how close you are,

               It might be near when it seems afar;

               So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -

               It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

Author Unknown              http://www.thedontquitpoem.com/thePoem.htm

http://thegodfreymethod.com